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Bad College Essay Examples

One of the best ways to figure out what you are going to write about is to cross things off of your list that simply won’t work. 91Ě˝»¨ clients often come to us with essays that they want to rework and refine, but when the topic itself is problematic, we have no choice but to start over. Let’s go over a few common topics that you should avoid.

The sports essay:

We like sports. They’re fun to play and watch. But a vast majority of sports essays fall into one of two categories: they aim to speak about your leadership abilities and dedication to improvement, or they aim to explain how a sport helped you with social skills. More on this later, but the first issue with writing about sports is that you probably (read: definitely) included the sports in your activity section. This is no-no number one. The second reason, which might be more important, is that as soon as the admissions team realizes they’re reading a sports essay, you’ll be put into a bucket. The student, who has good grades and stand-out activities, chose to write about sports. The sports bucket is not the place for you.

The influential family member essay:

We’ve said it a million times before, but it bears repeating: your family member is not applying to college. Your common app essay should be about you. We love secondary characters, but only when they act as mirrors. They exist only to play up the quality that you are trying to show about yourself. When your entire essay is about someone else, it won’t say much about you.

The community service trip essay:

It’s crucial to understand the difference between community service and community engagement. Tons of colleges ask questions about community, and community service has become a hot topic for common app essays because of the long-standing (and untrue) line of thinking that community service is the best way to get into college. When we say community engagement (which is good,) we’re talking about long-standing commitments to improving the area where you live. Think: a year’s long tutoring gig at the middle school, improving the recycling program at your school, organizing yearly marches in your neighborhood, or a continued effort towards cleaning up your coastal town after a natural disaster. The common thread between all of these examples is that they show a desire to improve the human condition that exists around you. Now, let’s talk about community service trips. If you’re not familiar with it yet, google “voluntourism.” The issue with service trips is that most of them haven’t been proven to create tangible improvements and they’re often seen as exploitative. It’s fine if you’re gone on a service trip, but we don’t recommend writing about it for your common app essay.

The academic achievement/extracurricular essay:

We know how hard all of our blog readers and clients work to get good grades and remain engaged with their extracurricular activities. It’s a lot of work. But a college admissions team member has a very short amount of time to read your essays, and you only have a few opportunities to add depth to your application. Your dream school is going to read through your activities section and look at your transcript immediately before they read your essay. This means that when you dedicate your common app essay to something that they just read about, they get bored because you’re choosing to expand on something that they already know. It’s redundant, and when you have so few chances to explain who you are as a person, you don’t have the luxury of doubling down on anything. This is why we preach the importance of your common app essay being about your personality, and something that has not been explained elsewhere in your application.

The cringe-worthy relationship essay:

For reasons that will likely always remain unclear, people come to us and write to us, asking for help about an essay about their partner. This cannot be stressed enough: there is not a single adult on earth that wants to read about a messy teenage relationship. It’s not the move, it doesn’t work, and it will make the admissions team feel weird. Needless to say, it also doesn’t say much about your personality and/or your soft skills. Please, avoid this topic at all costs.

We realize that it can be difficult to set aside essays that you’ve worked hard on. Our goal with this blog post is to help you get closer to ideas that will work by removing things that won’t serve you in the long run. Read this blog post if you’re looking to start fresh.

 

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